Have you ever observed a spinning top? It leans one way, and then another until it slows and topples. Notice that it never simply spins in the middle, centered, perfectly balanced in all directions.
Let’s take a look at that little metaphor of life, shall we?
How many things are you doing right now? How many jobs, titles and responsibilities all fall under the label of “MINE” at present?
Can you even count them?
Seriously. I can’t. Mom, Yoga Teacher, Professor, Writer, Daughter, Sister, Friend, Student, Yogi, Runner, CrossFitter, Athlete, Housekeeper (a bad one), CFO (equally unskilled in this department), CEO, Amatuer Chef, Mid-level Baker, Wannabe Standup Comedian, Grown-up (shiver).
The list goes on. And on. And on.
I wonder if I can fit that all on one business card? Oh wait. I know. I CAN. There is one title that covers all of that.
I am. . . DELUSIONAL.
Ha! But really. To be honest, I cannot possibly continue to do all of that all the time at a level of satisfaction that I would prefer. I (big surprise coming here, brace yourself), like to do everything right. I like to be the best. I want to be the winner. The example. The Superstar. Wonder Woman. Yep. For sure that’s me.
Or, I am learning, that just like a top, when I lean one direction, I am leaning away from another. If I give my time and energy to one thing, that by default, it means I am not giving it to something else.
I physically cannot lean in two directions at the same time.
That does not mean I haven’t been trying. I mean, I have a pretty decent Warrior Two pose and all but. . . Yeah. I still fall over. Often.
The solution? Change. Let go. Shift my priorities and change my expectations.
To tie it up nicely with a bow, I engage in the following:
For real. I mean it. Chill.
What does this really look like? Well, like this, actually:
1. Save yourself and get out of the pool, Narcissus.
Take a big breath and cut yourself a little slack. Despite what your ego may be demanding, you are human, actually. So, you know, take of the cape, offer yourself a little grace and get comfortable with not being numero uno in every.single.category.ever. You are enough. Accept that. Stop fighting for first. The leader of the pack blocks the wind for those behind him, enjoy a little reprieve from the full gale force now and then, would you?
2. Pick teams, choose sides and then rally.
Determine your priorities, both short and long term. Be clear and limited in scope. Depth not breadth. Decrease your bandwidth. Stay in perspective. Not everything has to be done RIGHT NOW, at the speed of light and before the kids get home from school. One step at a time. The journey of 1,000 miles starts with the first step, remember? Maybe figure out what step one is, eh?
3. Set your intention.
If you don’t know where you are now it will be difficult to recognize where you’re going and how you got there. Spend some time identifying your current reality then take a look down the path a few steps. Decide what you want. Be very very clear about how you would like your future to look and ask for it. Be specific and open to interpretation. We usually get exactly what we ask for, whether we recognize it or not, and dependent largely in part on the energy we are sending out into the universe. Be aware of your thoughts and stay positive in your intention so when that karmic boomerang comes back around you can catch it , and with open arms.
4. Clean your (metaphorical) house.
Get organized. Get rid of clutter, both tangible and intangible. If it’s not serving you, let it go. If it can be done by someone else, let it. If you can use help, take it. If you can give it away then let it find a new home. If it doesn’t help you, or the people in your lives in growth, then drop it, no matter how hard it is.
Less is more. I repeat. Less.Is.MORE.
5. Change your Mind(set)
If you can’t reasonably let something go at the moment, then change the way you think about it. Remember, everything is impermanent. Everything. Let work just be a means to an end and not an identity. Allow pain and fear to bring wisdom and experience. Let dealing with difficult people in your life be a lesson in patience and humanity; find the cry for love in every angry face.
“When we stop opposing reality, action becomes simple, fluid, kind, and fearless.”
My friends, be Dory- just keep swimming.